True Love Wanted |

What is the most important piece of relationship advice for men? What’s the single-most important thing for men to realize if they want their relationship to last?

Likely, the single most important piece of relationship advice for men is to spend more time observing what women show they want and paying a little less attention to the things women say they want.

How can you figure out the difference between what they say and what they actually want? Often it’s just a matter of observing what type of men women typically choose.

Women will often say “I want a man who listens.” Then they choose a man who dominates conversations. Women often say, “I want a man who has a great sense of humor.” Then they date the serious man with money.

Why is it that women say that they want one thing but then are only interested in men who are the complete opposite? To figure out what’s going on, you have to take a hard look at the subconscious motivators for men and women getting together.

Historically and biologically, the reason for men and women to get together is to breed. Even though getting pregnant might be the furthest thing from her conscious mind, when she subconsciously decides if a man is right for her, she’s often considering how good of a father for her (future) children the man will be.

Does being a good listener equal a good father? Subconsciously, no – the good father is someone who can provide for her children. The man with self confidnece is often the one who has the best chance at financial success and who can be the best breadwinner.

Women have a driven need for men who can be good providers. A man produces thousands of sperm thousands of occasions throughout their adult lives, even into their 90’s. On the other hand, women produce roughly 400 viable eggs in their lives. Because of this, women are looking for a man who can provide stability and security for their babies (even if they don’t have any or don’t consciously want any).

An attorney has a much better chance than a paralegal in landing a woman. That’s simply because the woman considers a lawyer to be a better provider for her future children.

But it’s not enough to have a great income. A woman muct perceive that the man will be generaous with his resources in order to better provide for her children. This is the reason many women place a high value on jewelry and other gifts.

This could also be why an engagement ring is often such a large purchase. When a man asks a woman to marry him, he gives her the ring, partially because it’s a romantic tradition, but also because it’s a symbol of how well he can provide for her and her children.

Finally, even though in today’s society brains have a much greater earning potential than brawn (except for perhaps the NFL), women are still hardwired to equate physical strength as an ability to provide security. That’s why, even when it’s obvious when it comes to potential future income, women are much more inclined to choose a strong, physically attractive guy than a computer geek, for example.

So my relationship advice for men is to try to figure out what a woman is looking for from an evolutionary standpoint and figure out a way to demonstrate your strengths in those areas.